It's also sth that, more than anything, more than ever, made me realize this one obvious painful fact of my life: I have always been alone. There's no way to sugarcoat it. No matter what, there won't be anyone. Not anyone. I have to be in this all alone. All alone. And to tell the truth, I'm not that brave, I'm not that wise, I'm not that mature. I get scared.
It hurt me to no end. I feel like I'm drowning.
Or,I feel like I'm deep down in a well where no one could find.
Let me grieve. Just let me. Because I need to cry so badly, please don't try to stop me.
Can anyone please tell me that they will be beside me, no matter what? that they won't just leave me?
or that everything will be okay, in the end?
Can anyone please tell me that?
But I'm just afraid that after you tell me all those I want to hear, I look into your eyes and I can only see all the lies...
How sad is that?
Can I just close my eyes and sleep away my life?
Why do I have to grow up? Be strong?
Sorry, Linh. You thought that I'm always cheerful and positive. I'm not. Don't look at me.
go to Clark Quay with your buddy and grab some beers :D
ReplyDeleteRim, I meant you can always try to bring a smile and look cheerful. You always look cheerful and positive.
ReplyDeleteI give you a big hug, and hope it helps. I can't tell you it's gonna be fine, because I also don't believe that.
You ask me to share with you, and don't just keep it to myself. Can you do the same thing to yourself? Allow yourself to be weak, that's what I am doing to myself ever since you said "You're allowed to do that". It feels much easier. Easier to cry, easier to breath, easier to let it out and let it go. Easier to get over.