Pearl asked me why I didn't blog recently. Yah, I blog less. Partly because my stupid laptop and my home network don't like each other.
Another reason is ...
Well, I don't really know how to put it down, the way I feel. What to say? Normally when I'm mentally unstable, I'd love to write things down, to look at them, to access them, to understand more wth I'm having, wth is happening inside my head, to face them.
Maybe this time I'm scared to look at them. And everything is blurred. Maybe I want it that way. Blurred. Nothing is clear enough for me to see. And I dont want to see.
But, maybe it's not the best way. I don't see, but I still can feel it.
Jeez. The whole mess is in my head now T_T
Maybe I should just write down T_T coz I hate talking to ppl about all these.
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